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Many people who don’t have HIV are in successful, loving, and intimate relationships with a partner who has HIV. This is sometimes referred to as a ‘serodiscordant’ or 'serodifferent' relationship.

Modern HIV treatment and care can significantly improve your partner’s health and life expectancy. Many people with HIV can expect to have a near-normal lifespan.

It may be reassuring to know that you can have a long-term relationship and a fulfilling sex life with your partner, and stay HIV negative. It’s completely safe to kiss and hug your partner. If your partner is taking HIV treatment and has an undetectable viral load, there is no risk of HIV transmission. Using condoms is also an effective way of preventing HIV transmission during sex. 

If you have questions about transmission, or other aspects of being in a relationship with someone who has HIV, such as having a family, or their life expectancy, you could think about making an appointment with your partner, or on your own, to see someone at your partner’s HIV clinic.

Roger Pebody

Roger Pebody

Commissioning Editor

Roger joined aidsmap in 2008 and was Managing Editor from 2018 to 2024. As a freelancer, he now edits aidsmap’s news and conference coverage, as well as working on updates to About HIV pages. He is also a contributing science editor for TheBodyPro, a freelance journalist for The Lancet HIV, and a medical writer helping researchers prepare articles for peer-reviewed journals. He began working on HIV at Gay Men Fighting AIDS in the mid-1990s.

Basic information

How is HIV transmitted?

Two men embracing.

How is HIV not transmitted?

A couple kissing.

Can mosquitoes transmit HIV?

A close-up of a mosquito sitting on a hand, with a green background.

Transmission facts

Transmission facts

Myths and facts

Myths and facts

Is HIV man-made?

An illustration of an HIV virus.

What does undetectable = untransmittable (U=U) mean?

Domizia Salusest | www.domiziasalusest.com

Undetectable = Untransmittable (U=U)

U=U leaflet front cover

What’s the difference between PrEP and PEP for HIV prevention?

I’m living with HIV. Can I have sex without a condom?

We’re both living with HIV. Can we have sex without a condom?

Transmission and the law

Transmission and the law

HIV transmission

Illustration of purple HIV viruses on a white background.

Impossible routes of HIV transmission

A couple kissing.

Undetectable viral load and HIV transmission

Mareike Günsche | www.aspect-us.com

Condoms

Image: sirtravelalot/Shutterstock.com

How to use condoms and lubricant

Image: kittiwat chaitoep/Shutterstock.com

Female condoms for anal sex

One man standing behind another, removing the jeans from the man in front.

Post-exposure prophylaxis (PEP)

A white pill bottle is tipped over with blue pills spilling out on to a wooden table., along with white pills.

PEP

PEP

Oral sex and HIV

Image: NDAB Creativity/Shutterstock.com

Sex toys and the risk of HIV transmission

fizkes/Shutterstock.com

Estimated HIV risk per exposure

Image: Kateryna Kon/Shutterstock.com

HIV in the UK

Two older men talk to each other in a garden.

Harm reduction

Naloxone at a needle exchange in Birmingham, UK. Nigel Brunsdon/nigelbrunsdon.com

Where did HIV come from?

Democratic Republic of the Congo. Image by Christina Bergey. Creative Commons licence.