Nothing can prepare you for finding out you have HIV. My first question was: "How long have I got to live?" I shook and cried

 I was planning to see my boyfriend, who lives overseas, three weeks after my diagnosis, and had to try and disguise how dreadful I was feeling emotionally every time we saw each other online. It was so difficult not to let him see my fear, but I somehow managed it. When I saw him again, three weeks after diagnosis, I had steeled myself to be honest with him. I had kept a diary of how I felt each day from the first phone call from the clinic until the day I told him, so that I could show him. He took me in his arms, and proposed to me - telling me that it was the only way he could show his depth of feeling and commitment to me. We plan to marry in 2007.